Many of us struggle with monthly bills and expenses. And when you’re trying to make your money stretch to cover your daily needs, it can feel overwhelming. It’s hard not to get stressed out when you feel like you don’t have enough money, and that worry can affect entire families.
If your loved ones are struggling financially, it can make you anxious, too. Sending money to help family members with the bills makes life easier for them and helps bring you peace of mind as well. Remitly exists to make it easier to send money across borders, so you can provide immediate relief with international money transfers for your family and show them how much you care—no matter how far away you are.
Let’s take a look at how helping someone with their bill payments can strengthen your relationship, some practical ways to send money, and how to make this gift meaningful and sustainable.
Why covering bills creates the ultimate peace of mind
Bills are a fact of life. Unlike discretionary expenses like entertainment, bills are something we simply have to pay. It’s essential to pay the rent or the mortgage to keep a roof over your head, and power and water bills also need to be paid, no matter what. Bills are about the basic things we need in order to live.
That’s why it’s so stressful when we can’t pay them. As psychotherapist Joyce Marter writes for Psychology Today, financial stress “erodes mental health and creates resentment and disconnection in relationships.”
Helping someone with the bills eases the mental burden of financial stress. Knowing that your basic needs are taken care of allows you to relax a little and enjoy life more. It can create space for someone to search for a new job or focus on personal growth, giving them the breathing room they need to take back control of their financial life.
Plus, helping someone with the bills is a great way to show them that you care. It can feel lonely when you’re struggling. After all, paying somebody’s electricity bill or rent payment can feel like one of the most meaningful gifts during a difficult time.
Common bills you can help cover with money transfers
Helping out with someone’s bills means more than just transferring them some money. It’s helpful to understand the kind of bills they are facing, so that you can decide where you can make the most meaningful impact.
1. Housing costs (rent or mortgage)
Housing is the single biggest monthly expense for most of us. Usually, rent payments are due on the first of the month, while mortgage payments follow a schedule determined by the lender.
Paying for housing is one of the most important bills we face, and these payments are not negotiable. Missing a mortgage payment can lead to fees, while not paying the rent can result in eviction. Because housing is so important, paying someone’s housing bill has an enormous impact on their happiness and mental health. It’s one of the most meaningful ways to help someone out of a tight spot.
2. Utilities
Utilities are things like electricity, water, gas, and internet bills. We all need water, light, and heat, and these days, we often need internet access for work and school requirements.
Unlike housing costs, these utility bills can vary from one month to another depending on usage. It’s worth finding out the payment schedule and due dates so that you can help with the bills in the most impactful way.
3. Groceries
We all need to eat. Grocery bills can vary quite a lot, and there are lots of ways to save money on groceries if you’re in a tight spot. But ultimately, food is a basic necessity for all of us.
Sending money for groceries allows your loved ones to adapt to changing prices or dietary needs, and it also helps take care of their health by providing nutritious meals. Plus, having some nice food to eat can be a real source of pleasure in a difficult time.
4. Insurance
Insurance is another important bill to stay on top of. Health, life, and car insurance protect customers against financial shocks. Some types of insurance, such as home and car insurance, may be required by law. Covering insurance premiums helps the people you care about maintain coverage and peace of mind, so that if the worst happens, they can get the support they deserve.
5. Transportation costs
Whether your loved ones travel by car or public transit, they may need transportation to get to work or to school. Car loan payments are usually paid monthly, but public transit passes can be purchased by week or by month in most places. Supporting someone’s transportation needs helps them stay active and mobile so that they can find new opportunities or maintain their income.
Of course, regular expenses vary greatly depending on where someone lives. Housing, groceries, and utilities are generally more expensive in major cities than in rural areas.
Different countries have very different costs of living, so you need to understand what your loved ones’ expenses are in your own currency so that you can be sure to send the right amount.
How to transfer money for bills safely and efficiently
Covering bill payments for others often means you will need to transfer money on a tight timeline and securely. That means choosing the right money transfer method is key.
1. Use secure transfer options
International transfers from trusted services like Remitly are ideal for cross-border payments. Remitly offers competitive exchange rates and easy transfers from your computer or an app on your phone. You can deposit money straight into someone’s bank account or have them pick up cash.
2. Don’t forget about exchange rates and fees
Every provider charges different fees for their services. Some may offer low or no-fee transfers, but they’ll make their money back by offering a poor exchange rate. Even small differences in the exchange rate can affect whether you send enough money to cover bills, so compare providers to make sure you’re getting the best rate.
3. Think about timing
Often, bills need to be paid quickly. And sometimes, the person you’re trying to help won’t give you much advance notice that they’re in need of money. Look for a provider that can deliver funds in minutes or hours, and consider a service that guarantees delivery times.
4. Track and confirm transfers
Most modern transfer services allow you to track a transfer so you can see exactly when it is delivered. Once you send the money, it’s a good idea to contact the recipient and ask them to confirm right away when they receive the money so that you know they have it.
Tip: Set up transfers to coincide with the recipient’s billing calendar. You can set up regular reminders or even automatic transfers to make sure that the essential bills like rent, electricity, or insurance are always paid on time.
Making bill assistance personal and meaningful
It can be embarrassing for someone to have to ask for support in paying their bills. Sending money is a great thing to do, but you also need to consider how it feels for someone to have to ask for help.
- Communicate your intentions. It’s a good idea to explain clearly that you want to help. It will mean a lot to the recipient if you don’t frame it as an obligation, but as something that you want to do. Phrases like “I’d like to help with this month’s rent so you can focus on work” emphasize encouragement and don’t sound like you’re trying to take control.
- Avoid guilt. Sometimes, asking for help can leave recipients feeling like they owe you something. You can avoid this by being careful with the language that you use. It’s always a good idea to remind your loved ones that you’re happy to help because they matter to you, and avoid words like ‘bailout’ or ‘rescue’. It may also be a load off their mind if you reassure them that there are no strings attached.
- Give support, not charity. A good way to keep your gesture positive is to connect it to shared goals. So you could say something like, “This will give you more space to save for school”, or “This will help you get to work.” Language like this helps the recipient feel like they are still in control of their financial life.
- Maintain respect. Having to ask for money makes a lot of people feel bad, but you can avoid generating these negative feelings by helping them feel respected. Asking which bills would be most helpful to cover and inviting them into the decision-making process lets them still feel like they have ownership over their financial situation instead of being dependent on you.
Setting boundaries and managing expectations
We all want to help where we can, but it’s just as important to make sure your generosity is sustainable for you as well as respectful to others.
- Only give what you can afford. It’s a good idea to review your own budget carefully before you offer to cover anybody else’s bills. Make sure you truly have enough money to spare without the risk of getting yourself into a bind.
- Be clear about what you are giving. It helps everyone know where they stand if you can let your loved one know whether this is a one-time gift or ongoing support. Clarity helps everyone and prevents resentment from developing between you.
- Manage ongoing requests. If you are asked for regular support, it’s best to be honest about what you can and can’t do. It’s okay to suggest alternatives, like helping with budgeting advice, but these conversations can be sensitive, so be as tactful as possible.
- Don’t be afraid to say no. Just because you helped someone out in the past doesn’t mean you have to forever. You have your own financial health to think about, so consider saying no if gifting money would increase your own stress.
Create your own quiet month today
Covering some of the bills during a tough time provides immediate relief. More than that, it gives the gift of peace of mind—both to the recipient and to you, since you won’t have to worry so much knowing your loved one is cared for. Plus, it also helps to remind the people you care about that you are thinking of them and are there to help them, which can deepen your relationship.
If you can afford to help out someone who needs it, consider it a blessing. At the same time, it’s smart to be aware of what you can afford and not give more than you can.
Secure money transfer services make it easier than ever to support loved ones across borders. By helping out with bills, you can stay connected to the people you love, even from far away.
FAQs
How much money should I send to cover bills?
Talk to your intended recipient about how much they need. It’s not always necessary for you to cover the entire bill, and it’s important to keep the amount within what you can afford.
Is it better to send money directly or pay bills myself?
Sending money directly gives the recipient more flexibility, but you may want to pay the bills yourself, especially if they can be paid online. This is especially true if you’re dealing with aging parents who may have memory issues or other people with diminished capacity.
What’s the safest way to send money internationally for bills?
The safest way to send money internationally for bills is with a secure and trusted service like Remitly. You get the best exchange rates, multiple methods of transfer, low fees, and strong security features.
How do I know if my money transfer will arrive on time?
Sending money through a trusted online payment provider means your money will be tracked through the entire transaction. Many providers also give you a guaranteed receipt date so you know the bills will be paid on time.
Should I tell the recipient exactly what the money is for?
It’s generally a good idea to tell the recipient what the money is for. That way, they can use it for their most important needs, providing peace of mind for both of you.
How often can I realistically help with bills?
It depends on your own needs. Giving so much that you struggle to pay your own bills is never a good idea, no matter how much you want to help. Try to be realistic about what you can afford to reduce stress for both you and your loved one.